Thursday, March 10, 2011

Rich Dad, Poor Wilk

Ever watch an entire half hour late night infomercial? How about one that lasts more than an hour? I knew what I was getting into, but I went anyway... and I regret it just the same.

Talk about Bait and Switch, the Rich Dad Poor Dad guy, Robert whatever his name is, wasn't even there. It was HIS product they were selling, but he wasn't there. We got a pitchman who could have just as well been selling knives or vacuum cleaners or crazy glue.

Don't get me wrong, he was EXCELLENT at what he does. I have seldom seen or heard a sales pitch so well crafted. And this guy was one of the guys who could talk SUPER FAST when he wanted to... like an auctioneer. They hit every one of the psychological buttons... they said every thing EXCEPT "act now, don't delay". Well they really DID say that, many many times... but not that exact phrase.

They actually went into a big thing about "What's the difference between the rich and to poor..." and one of the big points that they kept coming back to was "The rich TAKE ACTION !" And when it came time to reveal the big pitch, it was accompanied by "Take Action".

It was all well and good, with they guy trying to "make it fun... let's have fun with this... boy you guys are grumpy today... hey, this side of the room is louder than THAT side" ... trying to stir up audience participation... just like they do late night. (Host: "set it ..." Audience: "... and forget it!" accompanied by a big round of applause, by the audience, for the audience, because they can say the phrase "and forget it".)

BTW: this was the same routine Joe Hayes used to do at the Children's Theater down at Long Beach Island. "Hi boys and girls!! ... WHAT??? I can't HEAR YOU !!!"

I also saw this technique spelled out in a "How to do children's parties" guide for magicians.

I also saw Paul Stanley do this at a Kiss Concert.

So remember, the whole idea was that he was going to show us how to make money in the stock market, even when stocks are going down... or sideways. I'll jump ahead and tell you... what he was ACTUALLY going to show you how to register for a three day training session, including the study kit (in the limited edition yellow canvas bag), all for the low low price of $200. But wait... since you showed up, if you sign up today before you leave this room, we'll let you bring a guest with you to the three day session.

Truth is, this was really a pretty good deal. You got a couple of booklets on trading techniques, Robert's latest book Prophesy, the software CD (Mach Trader) which scans the market data in real time and gives you the charts and lists of stocks that meet your criteria, and one month free data feed from E-Signal (thereafter $45 per month, no contract, pay as you go)... and three days of training, for you and a friend. I suppose there might be more "opportunities" at the end of those 3 days (at a fee, of course).

It was all pretty light and upbeat, but at one point just before the big pitch, I SWEAR I saw horns grow out of this guy's head... in the name of Jesus! He was trying to impress upon us that he was not going to tell a lie, and that he would be accountable for what he was about to say... then went into this schpeel about how he attends a house of worship in his home town, based on a book 2000 years old, which gives the moral standards by which people have lived successful lives for all those years... all in his super fast pace. I heard some of the black ladies in the audience going into Gospel mode ("uh huh... you know it..."). He went on "... I'm accountable to my spouse and my community... we don't just want a good marriage, we want a GREAT marriage..." Apparently well chosen, because he was getting more "oh yea's" from the "congregation".

He also dragged out the America is the greatest country in the world, the most fertile green ground for investments... do you BELIEVE in America? Do you stand behind those men and women laying down their lives to protect our freedom?

Then finally the pitch... what you get, how much does it cost... act now and take a GUEST with you free... that DOUBLE's your value... bring your spouse and get TWICE the income into your home. Now this offer is only available at this price because you are HERE IN THIS ROOM RIGHT NOW. Call tomorrow, and the same offer over the phone will be $600.

Then he asks "How many are ready to sign up right now... cuz I'm gonna go on for another 90 minutes or however long it takes to go through as many of the investment techniques as I can... but let me first count who is ready to sign up RIGHT NOW.... 1, 2, 3..." (up to like 45) Then says, "while I start going into the details up here, how about all those who raised your hands go RIGHT TO THE BACK AND SIGN UP RIGHT NOW..."

So a ton of people head back to the tables in back, big ruckus in the room from this flurry of activity... and he says, for those of you who are NOT taking ACTION... I'll continue. Then he started to speak EVEN FASTER, being partially drowned out by the noisy room. Started showing the slides of searches you could do with the software, showed that if you looked at their MACD chart over time (that shows the "change in momentum") and bought and sold and shorted according to their method (as opposed to buying and holding)... making 5 transactions in APPLE in six months would have yielded a 26% gain, as opposed to a net loss. Then he paused and says "To those of you who DIDN'T take action... look behind you... you are now BEHIND all of those people. You have to stand in line and wait for THEM..." Then back to some more charts and slides.

Now, for those who never saw or heard "Rich Dad Poor Dad", the basic concept is to know the difference between assets and liabilities. Your HOME is not an asset, but a 2nd home which has a positive cash flow because you RENT it out... that's an asset. So he keeps going back to the "is this an asset or a liability..." game. He put up X-Box, and switched into "hellfire and tarnation" guy.... "it's a TOY for you CHILDREN, not for gown adults busy making money... and it teaches your children to be desensitized, to steal cars, to have their way with prostitutes, to sell crack, and to be lazy..." Then he puts up Education, Information, Knowledge, Financial Training... each going into the ASSET column... and finally he puts up Mach Trader for $200 in the Asset column.

He went back to more slides, but by then I'd had enough.

I did get my 5 gram block of 99.9% pure silver, in a soft pouch... and that's what I was really there for... the pouch.